I’ve gotten to the point in my life where I get sad when I hear women and men talking about weight loss. It’s not because I think no one needs to lose weight. Quite the contrary, I think that many people would change their life, their health, and their sense of self worth if they began to take care of themselves and their body reflected this in weight loss.

I get sad because almost every one I hear talking about weight loss is doing it wrong.

I know, bold statement. But, sometimes you have to shout loudly in order to get heard. And I think what I’m saying is worth shouting about.

Imagine that you were constantly hearing people talk about their deep desire and effort to save money. Then you heard them talking about spending, refusing to open up their bank statements and look at them, and often you heard them talking about opening up high interest rate credit cards.

Wouldn’t you want to shake them and scream – STOP?

Well, that’s how I feel about diets, and the commonly accepted path people take when they want to lose weight. The old approach is not only not working, but also its actually contributing to the problem.

Here are 5 commonly held beliefs about weight loss that I hear all too often.

Not only are they FALSE (yes, I am yelling – but with love, of course:), but they are harmful to your overall goals. I hope these help you to rethink the way you or your loved ones are approaching weight loss and health so that you can really get what you are desiring, and not just more of the same old thing.

1. I need to lose weight and then I will be happy

This belief is not only false, but it is backwards. Yes, you will be happy when you lose weight, I get that. But it doesn’t work in that order. It’s the other way around.

The truth is that you will start to heal your relationship with food and maintain permanent weight loss when you are truly happy. When you focus on your happiness first and foremost, weight loss is no longer tedious and difficult – the way dieting feels. You will notice your desire to emotionally eat decreases biotox reviewa when your life is balanced and you are deeply fulfilled. You must focus on being happy first, and let weight loss be an effect of that, not the other way around.

2. I just need to try harder and then I’ll lose the weight and fix this problem

Again, this belief is false and backwards. Trying too hard (what I call “Efforting”), is not going to help you maintain a healthy weight long term. You can lose weight in a short period of time this way, but it never, ever lasts. This is what leads to yo-yo dieting.

The truth is that allowing, instead of forcing, is a more powerful force when it comes to long-term permanent weight loss.

Allow yourself to reconnect to your body’s hunger and fullness signals. Allow yourself to be mindful of what your body is craving and what you want to eat and why. Allow yourself to learn about your habits, bad and good, so that you can make a mindful choice about how to eat healthier in the future.

Forcing the process only leads to burn out and exhaustion. This is why these really extreme diets don’t last. Very few of us can take that kind of forced exertion for very long. It is like swimming up stream. You don’t have to push so hard. You can relax into this process and allow yourself to begin to reconnect with your own wisdom. If you do this, you will have the energy and the insight to make this a lifestyle, and not just a short-term effort.